In other people hate Sarah Palin news

Regina Spektor is a genius. Plus, I really like her music. Plus plus, she loves the gays. Apparently, she did a few shows on Cyndi Lauper's True Colors tours, and why I never went to one of the True Colors shows, I do not know.

Also! She, like one of my other lady musician heroes, Alanis Morissette, recorded a song for a Chronicles of Narnia movie. "The Call" plays at the end of Prince Caspian, and it totally killed me both times.

And, some more: she did a song with one of my favorite boy musicians, Ben Folds, which I remember catching somewhere months ago, but then I forgot it, but then I read that blog post yesterday, and I was like, "Hey! Maybe Ben's album finally came out!" So I checked iTunes. It has not come out, but it was available for pre-order, and their song "You Don't Know Me" was immediately available. So I have been listening to it on a loop since then, and that is something I almost never. Ever. Do.

I remember the first time I ever heard her. The Potato and I were in the WDOM studio at 8:30 on a November morning (Tuesday? I think our shows were buttass early in the morning on Tuesdays that first semester), and I was looking through the new CDs that had gotten sent to the station. We were supposed to play ten songs from these new CDs, but since we only played female artists, we figured we could do five songs, because there were so many more male artists/bands in the station's add bin. Anyway, there was a 3-song EP from Regina, and it had a sticker on it with a quote from some reviewer that said she was like a cross between Bjork and Joni Mitchell. Carlos loves Bjork, and we both love Joni Mitchell, so I was like, "We should play this." I think we played "Us," and we both quickly dug it. "Carbon Monoxide" totally sold us, I think, but my favorite song from that little EP was "Ghost of Corporate Future." Eventually, I made it to the Providence Newbury Comics and bought her CD Soviet Kitsch, and I was head over heels.

Also, she does sound like a combo of Bjork and Joni Mitchell sometimes. She's pretty much the best new artist I've ever discovered. She may be the only new artist I've ever discovered all by myself... Whatever! Awesome. She is awesome.

In conclusion, I love when I discover that straight people I admire are awesome and eloquent allies. And when they share my opinions on horrifying politicians: "Then again, we are a heart beat away from having a very inexperienced woman (an insult to all actually deserving women out there) possibly lead our country off the deep end of the edge of human reason ... but that's a much longer post..."

Can't wait to read that blog post, Regina!

Anxiously awaiting the 25th

Well. I believe walking around with your hands shoved in your pockets was on "the list," yes?
Also, I kind of swoon for the long sleeve shirt under the scrubs top look. On everyone. But mostly Sara.

Okay, okay, also I was just on ABC's official Grey's site, and I noticed this at the bottom of the page in their collage of characters image.
Ignore Justin Chambers's head there, and check the Brooke/Sara laughter. That is totally an outtake from the kiss at the end of last season. I must see that outtake! Someone buy the season 4 DVDs and let me know if they include outtakes. And then let me borrow the special features disc. Cuz I already iTunes'd season 4 because I was jonesin' for more Brooke Smith action, and I was not about to watch Silence of the Lambs again to get my fix of that (eesh), so I will not be buying the DVDs this time. I am not that insane. Anymore.

In other I hate Sarah Palin news

The Governor of Alaska is at the very least interested in banning books. When she was elected mayor of Wasilla, she allegedly asked the city librarian if she would be all right with removing books from library shelves if the mayor saw fit to ask her to do so. The librarian said no, like any good librarian would. Whether it went any further is up for debate, blah blah, but the fact remains that Sarah Palin thinks government censorship of what we are able to read is a-okay.

Oh it is NOT.

Anyway, children, the ALA's Banned Books Week is coming up (September 27 - October 4), and in honor of that, I have decided to read the ten most challenged books of 2007, according to info gathered by the ALA. These books are

1. And Tango Makes Three by Justin Richardson/Peter Parnell
2. The Chocolate War by Robert Cormier
3. Olive’s Ocean by Kevin Henkes
4. The Golden Compass by Philip Pullman
5. The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain
6. The Color Purple by Alice Walker
7. TTYL by Lauren Myracle
8. I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou
9. It's Perfectly Normal by Robie Harris
10. The Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky

And actually, I've read three* of them already, so I'm cheating and only reading seven. Also And Tango Makes Three is a picture book about gay penguins, so really, it'll be six actual books. The Nashua Public library had best have all these books, but I will totally buy the gay penguins book if they don't have that.

The Chocolate War and Huck Finn, I think, appear on the ALA's list of most challenged books of all time (along with some of my very favorites, like The Giver and A Wrinkle in Time), and I don't know about the Chocolate War, but Huck Finn is always challenged because of how many times the n-word appears in it. And like, um. That's kind of the point of Huck Finn--it's the racism of the 1830s South through the eyes of a ten-year-old boy. Mark Twain wasn't racist; Huck isn't racist--the society in which this boy lives is racist. The book is not racist--it's not a Klan manifesto. God. People are so dumb.

Well. Duh. People who want to ban books are all idiots. Sigh.

Oh, by the way. What kind of books did Mayor Palin allegedly want to remove from her city's shelves? Gay ones, specifically Daddy's Roommate and Pastor, I Am Gay. Of course. Letting this woman anywhere near the White House is the worst idea I've ever heard.

*A token of my love and affection to anyone who can guess which three.

Should we talk about Gossip Girl?

I don't have a lot to say this time. I am glad that Serena and Dan broke up, and I loved how she yelled at him for being a judgmental prick, and then he fell down. Suck it, Dan!

Chuck is in love with Blair, blah blah, but he's back to being creepy instead of sympathetic. So. Creepy.

Nate and Vanessa--yawn.

Jenny, the wise intern, telling Eleanor how to breathe new life into her designs? JESUS CHRIST. Get rid of that posthaste.

Most disappointing of all, however, is the fact that the power went out, and NO ONE HAD SEX. No one. Maybe I'm too used to Showtime porn or something, but come on. It's a blackout. There are lots of sexy people on this show. But all they did was talk! Boo.

However, I am kind of wicked excited to see Dan and Serena fight next week. I wish Serena would date a lady now that she's free from the shackles of Humphriana, but I'll have to keep dreaming.

And where is Lily? Where is Eric? I want van der Woodsen bonding! Because I clearly won't get any lesbians!

Oh marry me, Jacob Clifton

From his recap of last week's episode of Gossip Girl:

"She texts Dorota (911, party to plan!!!) and they smile vaguely at each other; she waves the furious texting off like 'you know how it is, we're drunk, don't worry about it.' Hopefully that's the explanation for the punctuation abuse, anyway: my Blair certainly doesn't hit three exclamation points when only one is required."

Er, and Potes again, too:
"What? I carry my handbag in my vagina all the time. It really frees up your arms to carry groceries or pet kittens."

Makin' up words and song lists

The other day I made a playlist that I entitled "Nerdelation," which was basically a collection of my nerdiest songs--either songs nerds would enjoy or songs that just seem fundamentally nerdy to me. I don't know. I am not explaining this very well, but I totally dug it, so now I want to share it.

Nerdelation: Twenty-Five Songs for and Inspired by Nerds
1. Hey Sandy - Polaris (which was the theme song to The Adventure of Pete & Pete)
2. Rock This Bitch - Ben Folds
3. Do It with Madonna - The Androids
4. No Reason - Ben Kweller
5. Down with Disease - Phish
6. Mr. Mastodon Farm - Cake
7. Bats in the Belfry - Dispatch
8. Sister Kate - The Ditty Bops
9. Geek in the Pink - Jason Mraz
10. I'm Downright Amazed at What I Can Destroy with Just a Hammer - Atom & His Package
11. Piggies - The Beatles
12. My Dad Is Rich - Draco and the Malfoys
13. If You Want to Wear a Hat - Apples in Stereo
14. My Name Is Jorge - The Gourds
15. Chemistry - Semisonic
16. XFIRE - The Bens
17. Suspended in Gaffa - Kate Bush
18. Experimental Film - They Might Be Giants
20. When You Were Mine - Tegan and Sara
21. Jessica - Adam Green
22. Wrapped Up in Books - Belle & Sebastian
23. Three Is a Magic Number - Blind Melon
24. Thank You, Mario, But Our Princess Is in Another Castle - The Mountain Goats & Kaki King
25. Will You Love Me Tomorrow? - Tina Fey, Jimmy Fallon & Rudy Giuliani
26. Chordless - Jess Kaps

Intrigued? I burn CDs!

Heh. I know this was probably fun for only me, but I thought I'd throw it out there to the world.

Oh! Just for fun, let's see what Genius gives me for songs based upon "Hey Sandy":
1. Hey Sandy - Polaris
2. These Days - Nico
3. Experimental Film - They Might Be Giants
4. F.N.T. - Semisonic
5. Step into My Office, Baby - Belle & Sebastian
6. Thirteen - Big GStar
7. Kids in America - The Muffs
8. Tired of Sex - Weezer
9. Stop! - The Bens
10. Jessica - Adam Green
11. Army - Ben Folds
12. Drain You - Nirvana
13. Science vs. Romance - Rilo Kiley
14. Summerbaby - Polaris
15. When I Grow Up - Garbage
16. Singing in My Sleep - Semisonic
17. Heavy Metal Drummer - Wilco
18. King of the Rodeo - Kings of Leon
19. Keep Fishin' - Weezer
20. Wasted & Ready - Ben Kweller
21. Honestly - Zwan
22. If She Wants Me - Belle & Sebastian
23. Alright - Supergrass
24. Come On Eileen - Save Ferris
25. It's a Hit - Rilo Kiley

Well. This actually isn't a bad playlist, but it's not nerdy enough. And I totally should have put Weezer on my playlist, but I would have picked "In the Garage," which is quite possibly the nerdiest of all their nerdy songs. And Genius and I only had two songs in common besides "Hey Sandy," but we had a few artists in common. So. Not bad, Genius, not bad.

I really don't like to talk about feet, I swear

Once upon a time, when I was still underage, in a far away land some called Roe Dyeland, I got drunk (I know!) and went to a gay bar (I know!). At that gay bar, there were pole-dancing stages dispersed throughout the dance floor, and because I was drunk, and because peer pressure works much better on me when I'm drunk, I got up on one of these stages with my friends and acted a fool.

Naturally, when I had had enough acting a fool, I jumped off the stage, which was an idiotic idea, because I was drunk. So of course I landed badly and totally and utterly fucked up my left ankle. It was probably pretty badly sprained, but did I go to the health center on Monday? No. I bought a brace and CVS and sucked it up, and after a while it stopped hurting, but I really don't think my foot has been the same since then. Whenever I wear shoes, it just doesn't feel right when I walk, and whenever I walk for long periods of time, even in flip-flops, it gets all...hurty while my right foot remains stalwart and true.

It was especially painful that time I spent an entire weekend wandering around New York City and also the time I spent, like, four days wandering around Toronto. Both times, my right foot was fine.

I need a new left foot.

Christian Siriano did not invent the word fierce

I sure did enjoy Stacie Ponder's Top Model recap over at afterellen, but nothing will ever top Potes's recaps at Television Without Pity, I'm afraid. (Dan Blau's recaps of the earliest cycles are not to be missed either.)

I mean, she makes references to mythology:
"Tyra tries, as she does at the beginning of every L.A. season, to convince us that L.A. is the epicenter of the fashion world, because it is where she sprung fully formed from her own giant forehead. In the beginning was the forehead."

She's topical!
"Hannah will only become interesting if it turns out she is Bristol Palin in disguise. I bet you didn't know the McCain campaign was pro-fierce, did you?"

And she conjures an image of Tyra as Augustus Gloop:
"The body scan room looks a lot like the room where Mike TeeVee was miniaturized in the original Willy Wonka. You know that Tyra is already stuck in a chocolate extraction pipe somewhere on the premises."

Could anything be more perfect? Just in case you think Stacie has the edge because she writes for a gay website, Potes is also a lesbian. Boo-yah.

And as a bonus, she throws in a reference to a sitcom I thought only I had ever watched:
"This may be Tyra's finest acting performance ever, and she's clearly taken inspiration from reruns of Small Wonder."

Teenage nerds

So. It's no secret that I like books and movies aimed at younger audiences. Netflix knows this. Amazon knows this. So at one point, Amazon recommended a book to me called Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist, and I was like, whatever. Then I vaguely heard it had been made into a movie, so the next time I was at Barnes & Noble, I picked it up, because I was in the mood for some light YA literature.

And it was good. Like, better than I ever expected, but I have a slight problem. This book is from 2006, and the protagonists are seniors in high school, and nearly all the pop culture references are to things that almost I am too young for. Like, there are copious references to My So-Called Life, which I loved, but I was ten when that show was on, and these little shits would have been, like, six. I know, I know, it got second life on MTV, but the characters seem too young to be this cool.

Also, there was a whole big Sound of Music thing, and that's timeless, and I loved it, and the best part of all, the entire novel was full of gayness, despite the fact that it was a straight love story.

Anyway, I started writing all this because I just saw the trailer, and I get that they had to change some stuff from the book so that we get all the salient back story points. But. But! In the trailer, it's Norah who asks Nick to be her boyfriend for five minutes, and in the book it's Nick who asks Norah to be his girlfriend for five minutes. Why did they change that? Why did they make the girl more pathetic? WHY?

I wrote this in June. Why I never posted it I couldn't say.

These days I’ve been wishing I knew how to write a screenplay, because I want to see Annie on My Mind adapted for film. Not that if I could write a screenplay, that would happen, but… I kind of want to try it anyway, because I love to go on and on and on about how the book is better than the movie, blah blah. Like, I know it’s hard to adapt a novel to fit into two hours, and that plotting and pacing and characterization have to be done very differently in a film, and I’m not even that good at writing stories with a beginning, middle, and end, but well. I wanted to try, for some reason, to see if it could be done better. And if this book in particular could be done at all.

If I could adapt Annie on My Mind for a screenplay, then maybe… Somebody else could. Or I could win the lottery and find someone to produce it for me. Someone who knows how to make a movie. I have never, ever been interested in, like, making movies, but I really wish there was a movie about teenage lesbians that doesn’t end in one of them going back to guys and/or one of them killing herself. Mostly, I want the anti-Lost and Delirious.

And then I was trying to think of who I could cast in this film, you know, if I had unlimited resources and any idea about how to make a movie. And I was like, “Blake Lively could be Annie,” because, uh… I have a crush on her. And she could, I think. Annie’s more like Bridget Vreeland than Serena van der Woodsen, so it would work. Even though Annie has long, dark hair, and if this movie were to happen, and someone like Blake Lively were to be cast as Annie, I’d be all, “Annie’s not a blonde!”

I can’t even please myself.

Who’d be Liza? For a while, I was toying with the idea of Anna Popplewell, because, uh, I had just seen Prince Caspian, and she’s beautiful, and she seems to be able to capture this quiet, soulful thing that I think works for Liza. Plus, I’m short on actors who could play teenagers. The only teenaged show I watch is Gossip Girl—thus, Blake Lively. And as much as I want to see Blair and Serena fall in love, Leighton Meester’s not Liza, so.

The thing about this, though, is that Anna Popplewell and Blake Lively don’t mesh in my head. Someone needs to be recast. I think Blake’s the one who’s not really a good fit and is only in here because I want to see her kiss a girl.

All right, lesbians. I think one of you has read Annie on My Mind (and whoever else is here, not reading Annie on My Mind, should read it, even the one non-lesbian. I’ll let you borrow it!). Who would you pick to play Annie and Liza in my fantasy film? And where can I pick up actors young enough to play teenagers? Blake’s twenty-one, and Anna’s…nineteen? So they’re pretty much perfect as far as Hollywood ages go. Probably, if this were a real movie, the best thing to do would be send a casting director out to senior classes and find two unknowns, but since this is a fantasy movie, I have to fantasy cast famous people.

The only character I’m, like, totally solid on is Chad, Liza’s little brother, who I think should totally be played by Connor Paolo, tiny gay Eric from Gossip Girl. He’s great at being the little brother, and Chad’s a great little brother, who loves his sister even though the gay thing totally throws him.

The adults I can’t be bothered to think up, even the two other lesbians, Ms. Widmer and Ms. Stevenson. But I have to cast Liza’s best friend Sally and her boyfriend Walt. Sally’s basically an idiot, and Walt’s kind of a good guy, but kind of a frat guy. I don’t know.

Sadly, my favorite lesbians, Bridget McManus and Jill Bennett, are way too old to be the teenagers but way too young to be the older lesbian couple. There’s not a single out actor the right age to play a teenaged lesbian, is there? I’d like to throw Jodie Foster in there, as Ms. Widmer, Liza’s gay English teacher. How about that?

Do you know what I recently found out? Nancy Garden, the author of this novel, married her high school sweetheart. Legally and everything, because at the back of the book it says she lives in Massachusetts. That’s sweet. So, in my head, that means Liza and Annie last forever, too. Though I imagine Nancy and her lady might really be Ms. Widmer and Ms. Stevenson. Whatever.

The book takes place in, I dunno, the late seventies, probably, because it was published in 1982, and I think I read somewhere that it took a while for a publisher to accept it—or Nancy Garden published it herself because no one wanted it, but I might be making that up. Anyway, the homophobia is really strong because of the time period, but the sad thing is, twenty-five years later, the reactions of Liza’s family and classmates and headmistress do not seem out of place. Neither do Liza and Annie’s fears of being all gay in public.

Sigh. It is hard to be gay.

Allison just suggested that Ellen Page could be in my fantasy movie, and I wholeheartedly agree. I think she’d be Liza. Who could be Annie, then? This is hard. I am clearly not cut out to be in pictures.

Genius experiments

So. I downloaded iTunes 8 because I really, really, really wanted to see how good this Genius feature was going to be, and I made 3 quick playlists based on 3 of my favorite songs these days.

The first one is based on the iTunes Live Sessions version of Tegan and Sara's "Back in Your Head":
1. Back in Your Head - Tegan and Sara
2. Portions for Foxes - Rilo Kiley
3. The Sound of Settling - Death Cab for Cutie
4. Be Be Your Love - Rachael Yamagata
5. Breakable - Ingrid Michaelson
6. Satellite - Guster
7. I Know I Know I Know - Tegan and Sara
8. 12:51 - The Strokes
9. Bottle It Up - Sara Bareilles
10. If She Wants Me - Belle & Sebastian
11. On the Radio - Regina Spektor
12. The Story - Brandi Carlile
13. Everything I'm Not - The Veronicas
14. Catch My Disease - Ben Lee
15. Crooked Teeth - Death Cab for Cutie
16. Brick - Ben Folds Five
17. Four Winds - Bright Eyes
18. Taper Jean Girl - Kings of Leon
19. Nineteen - Tegan and Sara
20. Silver Lining - Rilo Kiley
21. Phantom Limb - The Shins
22. Anyone Else But You - The Moldy Peaches
23. Us - Regina Spektor
24. Goodnight Goodnight - Hot Hot Heat
25. Fluorescent Adolescent - Arctic Monkeys

This one's based on "Downpour":
1. Downpour - Brandi Carlile
2. You Don't Make It Easy, Babe - Josh Ritter
3. Get Out the Map - Indigo Girls
4. Slung-Lo - Erin McKeown
5. Gravity - Sara Bareilles
6. Tried to Be True - Indigo Girls & Brandi Carlile
7. Airline to Heaven - Wilco
8. Sunny Came Home - Shawn Colvin
9. Breakable - Ingrid Michaelson
10. Welcome Me - Indigo Girls
11. See the World - Gomez
12. Hallelujah - Brandi Carlile
13. Madly - Tristan Prettyman
14. Song Beneath the Song - Maria Taylor
15. Life Less Ordinary - Carbon Leaf
16. Language or the Kiss - Indigo Girls
17. Golden Age of Radio - Josh Ritter
18. Not As We - Alanis Morissette
19. What Light - Wilco
20. Gotta Serve Somebody - Bob Dylan
21. The Facts about Jimmy - Shawn Colvin
22. When the Stars Go Blue - Ryan Adams
23. The Story - Brandi Carlile
24. Across the Universe - Rufus Wainwright
25. Southland in the Springtime - Indigo Girls

And this final one, just so I could embarrass myself some more on the internet, is based on "Since U Been Gone":
1. Since U Been Gone - Kelly Clarkson
2. Everything I'm Not - The Veronicas
3. You and I Both - Jason Mraz
4. Hero - Mariah Carey
5. As Lovers Go - Dashboard Confessional
6. Wreck of the Day - Anna Nalick
7. Ironic - Alanis Morissette
8. Samson - Regina Spektor
9. Addicted - Kelly Clarkson
10. You Had Me - Joss Stone
11. Comfortable - John Mayer
12. Love and Memories - O.A.R.
13. The Sound of Settling - Death Cab for Cutie
14. This Year's Love - David Gray
15. Say You'll Be There - Spice Girls
16. Amazing - Josh Kelley
17. 4Ever - The Veronicas
18. You Thought Wrong - Kelly Clarkson & Tamyra Gray
19. Look After You - The Fray
20. You Found Me - Kelly Clarkson
21. Always Be My Baby - Mariah Carey
22. My Prerogative - Britney Spears
23. Black Roses Red - Alana Grace
24. Only Hope - Mandy Moore
25. Why Can't I? - Liz Phair

On the whole, Genius does a decent job of pulling songs that do go rather well together, but it repeats artists more often than I would in the space of twenty-five songs, and... I don't know. I usually make playlists for driving, so I pay more attention to what I like to sing while I'm in the car than whether or not the songs flow or whatever. My playlists are fun, if not musically sophisticated.

Anyway, Genius is fun just for seeing which songs it matches together, but it will not take over playlist duty the next time I drive to Canada. Also, I just realized it's basically a fancified version of iTunes' old feature, Smart Shuffle or whatever the crap that was. Party Shuffle? Yeah. It's better than that, but still not better than me!

A weekly feature?

I knew investing in the Gossip Girl season pass was a brilliant idea. Good morning, Blake Lively in a bra!
However. Making out with Dan in the bathroom of a bus? Ew. Ew. Ew. (Mostly for the bus, but still a little bit for the Dan.)

How cute was Chuck's squash playing outfit? (What even is squash, by the way? It looks like raquetball, I guess.) Chuck gets the best clothes. Why isn't he gay?

(Seriously. How gay is this capture? Chuck gettin' some sweaty young man's digits.)

Oh Chuck. Selling his club to keep Mrs. Archibald's spoiled ass in her finery. He does have a functioning heart. Why can't he tell Blair he loves her?

You know who I didn't miss? Vanessa. She's kind of hot, but she's too annoying for it to be worth it. And why is Rufus asking her for advice? He's a grown man, and she's a child! What weirdness.

I don't like Blair trying too hard. Especially not for some guy. Oh, but Serena's reactions kind of make up for it.
I sure do love Blake's face.
Oh, Blair. Uncovering the dirt. As soon as she has something to use as blackmail, she's back to Queen B and not this desperate wannabe. Bitchface looks much better on her than sucking up.
Um, two episodes into the season, and we still haven't seen Lily, but we did see Serena's evil grandmother? And where is Eric? Why did we have to trade him for Vanessa? And what is Vanessa doing with Nate, getting her cafe all set up for a romantic dinner? I thought they decided they shouldn't date. Oh, whatever.

Serena and Chuck as stepsiblings is actually kind of fun. (I tried to get a capture of her stealing his orange juice--or "orange juice," since it is Chuck after all--but his face looked awful in all of them, so...you'll just have to imagine it.) Now we just need a Serena-Eric-Chuck bonding session. I might die from the cuteness.