Come rescue me

I had the weirdest dream this morning: I was on some kind of field trip with… the Babysitters Club—or at least Mal and Jessi (who my brain mistakenly called Jackie), and the trip was being chaperoned by Tom Colicchio of Top Chef. And! Mal and Jessi were secretly dating girls—at the tender age of eleven—and everyone knew, and no one had a problem, but they were too scared to admit it, so I was trying to open up a way for them to say they were actually with their girls (because I can’t stand it when eleven-year-olds are in the closet, you know) when Colicchio came over and yelled at us. And then the dream ended with me getting off the bus and talking to Kristen Bell, who was, like, Colicchio’s minion, in some kind of stupid accent while she picked up trash.

Wait. What?

First of all, I don’t know where this Kristen Bell thing came from. I have never even seen so much as ten seconds of Veronica Mars, and only her voice is on Gossip Girl. That was bizarre. Second, why was I dreaming about Mallory and Jessi from The Babysitters Club, and why was I dreaming that they were both lesbians? If anyone in The Babysitters Club is a lesbian, it is Kristy (duh). Also, I haven’t even thought of The Babysitters Club in months. Oh, did you know Zach Braff guest starred on an episode of the horrible tv show? He did, as a love interest for Dawn, and his mom wanted to cut down some trees to build a development or whatever, so Dawn had this conflict between cute boy and saving the environment. Dawn was easily the most boring babysitter. More boring than Mary Anne? Yes.

I guess the Colicchio thing makes the most sense, since I watched the last ten minutes of Top Chef last night (and didn’t tell Allison, because she was already bummed out, and her favorite got axed while my favorite won the challenge). Still! Chaperoning a field trip. That’s kind of hilarious.

This concludes another entry in Emily’s Dream Journal.

Today, I had a fight about an apostrophe, and I lost! Which is even more irritating because I was right! And no one cared! Why am I here, then? Fuckin’…fuck.