Once upon a time, when I was still underage, in a far away land some called Roe Dyeland, I got drunk (I know!) and went to a gay bar (I know!). At that gay bar, there were pole-dancing stages dispersed throughout the dance floor, and because I was drunk, and because peer pressure works much better on me when I'm drunk, I got up on one of these stages with my friends and acted a fool.
Naturally, when I had had enough acting a fool, I jumped off the stage, which was an idiotic idea, because I was drunk. So of course I landed badly and totally and utterly fucked up my left ankle. It was probably pretty badly sprained, but did I go to the health center on Monday? No. I bought a brace and CVS and sucked it up, and after a while it stopped hurting, but I really don't think my foot has been the same since then. Whenever I wear shoes, it just doesn't feel right when I walk, and whenever I walk for long periods of time, even in flip-flops, it gets all...hurty while my right foot remains stalwart and true.
It was especially painful that time I spent an entire weekend wandering around New York City and also the time I spent, like, four days wandering around Toronto. Both times, my right foot was fine.
I need a new left foot.
September 14, 2008
September 13, 2008
Christian Siriano did not invent the word fierce
I sure did enjoy Stacie Ponder's Top Model recap over at afterellen, but nothing will ever top Potes's recaps at Television Without Pity, I'm afraid. (Dan Blau's recaps of the earliest cycles are not to be missed either.)
I mean, she makes references to mythology:
"Tyra tries, as she does at the beginning of every L.A. season, to convince us that L.A. is the epicenter of the fashion world, because it is where she sprung fully formed from her own giant forehead. In the beginning was the forehead."
She's topical!
"Hannah will only become interesting if it turns out she is Bristol Palin in disguise. I bet you didn't know the McCain campaign was pro-fierce, did you?"
And she conjures an image of Tyra as Augustus Gloop:
"The body scan room looks a lot like the room where Mike TeeVee was miniaturized in the original Willy Wonka. You know that Tyra is already stuck in a chocolate extraction pipe somewhere on the premises."
Could anything be more perfect? Just in case you think Stacie has the edge because she writes for a gay website, Potes is also a lesbian. Boo-yah.
And as a bonus, she throws in a reference to a sitcom I thought only I had ever watched:
"This may be Tyra's finest acting performance ever, and she's clearly taken inspiration from reruns of Small Wonder."
I mean, she makes references to mythology:
"Tyra tries, as she does at the beginning of every L.A. season, to convince us that L.A. is the epicenter of the fashion world, because it is where she sprung fully formed from her own giant forehead. In the beginning was the forehead."
She's topical!
"Hannah will only become interesting if it turns out she is Bristol Palin in disguise. I bet you didn't know the McCain campaign was pro-fierce, did you?"
And she conjures an image of Tyra as Augustus Gloop:
"The body scan room looks a lot like the room where Mike TeeVee was miniaturized in the original Willy Wonka. You know that Tyra is already stuck in a chocolate extraction pipe somewhere on the premises."
Could anything be more perfect? Just in case you think Stacie has the edge because she writes for a gay website, Potes is also a lesbian. Boo-yah.
And as a bonus, she throws in a reference to a sitcom I thought only I had ever watched:
"This may be Tyra's finest acting performance ever, and she's clearly taken inspiration from reruns of Small Wonder."
September 12, 2008
Teenage nerds
So. It's no secret that I like books and movies aimed at younger audiences. Netflix knows this. Amazon knows this. So at one point, Amazon recommended a book to me called Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist, and I was like, whatever. Then I vaguely heard it had been made into a movie, so the next time I was at Barnes & Noble, I picked it up, because I was in the mood for some light YA literature.
And it was good. Like, better than I ever expected, but I have a slight problem. This book is from 2006, and the protagonists are seniors in high school, and nearly all the pop culture references are to things that almost I am too young for. Like, there are copious references to My So-Called Life, which I loved, but I was ten when that show was on, and these little shits would have been, like, six. I know, I know, it got second life on MTV, but the characters seem too young to be this cool.
Also, there was a whole big Sound of Music thing, and that's timeless, and I loved it, and the best part of all, the entire novel was full of gayness, despite the fact that it was a straight love story.
Anyway, I started writing all this because I just saw the trailer, and I get that they had to change some stuff from the book so that we get all the salient back story points. But. But! In the trailer, it's Norah who asks Nick to be her boyfriend for five minutes, and in the book it's Nick who asks Norah to be his girlfriend for five minutes. Why did they change that? Why did they make the girl more pathetic? WHY?
And it was good. Like, better than I ever expected, but I have a slight problem. This book is from 2006, and the protagonists are seniors in high school, and nearly all the pop culture references are to things that almost I am too young for. Like, there are copious references to My So-Called Life, which I loved, but I was ten when that show was on, and these little shits would have been, like, six. I know, I know, it got second life on MTV, but the characters seem too young to be this cool.
Also, there was a whole big Sound of Music thing, and that's timeless, and I loved it, and the best part of all, the entire novel was full of gayness, despite the fact that it was a straight love story.
Anyway, I started writing all this because I just saw the trailer, and I get that they had to change some stuff from the book so that we get all the salient back story points. But. But! In the trailer, it's Norah who asks Nick to be her boyfriend for five minutes, and in the book it's Nick who asks Norah to be his girlfriend for five minutes. Why did they change that? Why did they make the girl more pathetic? WHY?
September 11, 2008
I wrote this in June. Why I never posted it I couldn't say.
These days I’ve been wishing I knew how to write a screenplay, because I want to see Annie on My Mind adapted for film. Not that if I could write a screenplay, that would happen, but… I kind of want to try it anyway, because I love to go on and on and on about how the book is better than the movie, blah blah. Like, I know it’s hard to adapt a novel to fit into two hours, and that plotting and pacing and characterization have to be done very differently in a film, and I’m not even that good at writing stories with a beginning, middle, and end, but well. I wanted to try, for some reason, to see if it could be done better. And if this book in particular could be done at all.
If I could adapt Annie on My Mind for a screenplay, then maybe… Somebody else could. Or I could win the lottery and find someone to produce it for me. Someone who knows how to make a movie. I have never, ever been interested in, like, making movies, but I really wish there was a movie about teenage lesbians that doesn’t end in one of them going back to guys and/or one of them killing herself. Mostly, I want the anti-Lost and Delirious.
And then I was trying to think of who I could cast in this film, you know, if I had unlimited resources and any idea about how to make a movie. And I was like, “Blake Lively could be Annie,” because, uh… I have a crush on her. And she could, I think. Annie’s more like Bridget Vreeland than Serena van der Woodsen, so it would work. Even though Annie has long, dark hair, and if this movie were to happen, and someone like Blake Lively were to be cast as Annie, I’d be all, “Annie’s not a blonde!”
I can’t even please myself.
Who’d be Liza? For a while, I was toying with the idea of Anna Popplewell, because, uh, I had just seen Prince Caspian, and she’s beautiful, and she seems to be able to capture this quiet, soulful thing that I think works for Liza. Plus, I’m short on actors who could play teenagers. The only teenaged show I watch is Gossip Girl—thus, Blake Lively. And as much as I want to see Blair and Serena fall in love, Leighton Meester’s not Liza, so.
The thing about this, though, is that Anna Popplewell and Blake Lively don’t mesh in my head. Someone needs to be recast. I think Blake’s the one who’s not really a good fit and is only in here because I want to see her kiss a girl.
All right, lesbians. I think one of you has read Annie on My Mind (and whoever else is here, not reading Annie on My Mind, should read it, even the one non-lesbian. I’ll let you borrow it!). Who would you pick to play Annie and Liza in my fantasy film? And where can I pick up actors young enough to play teenagers? Blake’s twenty-one, and Anna’s…nineteen? So they’re pretty much perfect as far as Hollywood ages go. Probably, if this were a real movie, the best thing to do would be send a casting director out to senior classes and find two unknowns, but since this is a fantasy movie, I have to fantasy cast famous people.
The only character I’m, like, totally solid on is Chad, Liza’s little brother, who I think should totally be played by Connor Paolo, tiny gay Eric from Gossip Girl. He’s great at being the little brother, and Chad’s a great little brother, who loves his sister even though the gay thing totally throws him.
The adults I can’t be bothered to think up, even the two other lesbians, Ms. Widmer and Ms. Stevenson. But I have to cast Liza’s best friend Sally and her boyfriend Walt. Sally’s basically an idiot, and Walt’s kind of a good guy, but kind of a frat guy. I don’t know.
Sadly, my favorite lesbians, Bridget McManus and Jill Bennett, are way too old to be the teenagers but way too young to be the older lesbian couple. There’s not a single out actor the right age to play a teenaged lesbian, is there? I’d like to throw Jodie Foster in there, as Ms. Widmer, Liza’s gay English teacher. How about that?
Do you know what I recently found out? Nancy Garden, the author of this novel, married her high school sweetheart. Legally and everything, because at the back of the book it says she lives in Massachusetts. That’s sweet. So, in my head, that means Liza and Annie last forever, too. Though I imagine Nancy and her lady might really be Ms. Widmer and Ms. Stevenson. Whatever.
The book takes place in, I dunno, the late seventies, probably, because it was published in 1982, and I think I read somewhere that it took a while for a publisher to accept it—or Nancy Garden published it herself because no one wanted it, but I might be making that up. Anyway, the homophobia is really strong because of the time period, but the sad thing is, twenty-five years later, the reactions of Liza’s family and classmates and headmistress do not seem out of place. Neither do Liza and Annie’s fears of being all gay in public.
Sigh. It is hard to be gay.
Allison just suggested that Ellen Page could be in my fantasy movie, and I wholeheartedly agree. I think she’d be Liza. Who could be Annie, then? This is hard. I am clearly not cut out to be in pictures.
If I could adapt Annie on My Mind for a screenplay, then maybe… Somebody else could. Or I could win the lottery and find someone to produce it for me. Someone who knows how to make a movie. I have never, ever been interested in, like, making movies, but I really wish there was a movie about teenage lesbians that doesn’t end in one of them going back to guys and/or one of them killing herself. Mostly, I want the anti-Lost and Delirious.
And then I was trying to think of who I could cast in this film, you know, if I had unlimited resources and any idea about how to make a movie. And I was like, “Blake Lively could be Annie,” because, uh… I have a crush on her. And she could, I think. Annie’s more like Bridget Vreeland than Serena van der Woodsen, so it would work. Even though Annie has long, dark hair, and if this movie were to happen, and someone like Blake Lively were to be cast as Annie, I’d be all, “Annie’s not a blonde!”
I can’t even please myself.
Who’d be Liza? For a while, I was toying with the idea of Anna Popplewell, because, uh, I had just seen Prince Caspian, and she’s beautiful, and she seems to be able to capture this quiet, soulful thing that I think works for Liza. Plus, I’m short on actors who could play teenagers. The only teenaged show I watch is Gossip Girl—thus, Blake Lively. And as much as I want to see Blair and Serena fall in love, Leighton Meester’s not Liza, so.
The thing about this, though, is that Anna Popplewell and Blake Lively don’t mesh in my head. Someone needs to be recast. I think Blake’s the one who’s not really a good fit and is only in here because I want to see her kiss a girl.
All right, lesbians. I think one of you has read Annie on My Mind (and whoever else is here, not reading Annie on My Mind, should read it, even the one non-lesbian. I’ll let you borrow it!). Who would you pick to play Annie and Liza in my fantasy film? And where can I pick up actors young enough to play teenagers? Blake’s twenty-one, and Anna’s…nineteen? So they’re pretty much perfect as far as Hollywood ages go. Probably, if this were a real movie, the best thing to do would be send a casting director out to senior classes and find two unknowns, but since this is a fantasy movie, I have to fantasy cast famous people.
The only character I’m, like, totally solid on is Chad, Liza’s little brother, who I think should totally be played by Connor Paolo, tiny gay Eric from Gossip Girl. He’s great at being the little brother, and Chad’s a great little brother, who loves his sister even though the gay thing totally throws him.
The adults I can’t be bothered to think up, even the two other lesbians, Ms. Widmer and Ms. Stevenson. But I have to cast Liza’s best friend Sally and her boyfriend Walt. Sally’s basically an idiot, and Walt’s kind of a good guy, but kind of a frat guy. I don’t know.
Sadly, my favorite lesbians, Bridget McManus and Jill Bennett, are way too old to be the teenagers but way too young to be the older lesbian couple. There’s not a single out actor the right age to play a teenaged lesbian, is there? I’d like to throw Jodie Foster in there, as Ms. Widmer, Liza’s gay English teacher. How about that?
Do you know what I recently found out? Nancy Garden, the author of this novel, married her high school sweetheart. Legally and everything, because at the back of the book it says she lives in Massachusetts. That’s sweet. So, in my head, that means Liza and Annie last forever, too. Though I imagine Nancy and her lady might really be Ms. Widmer and Ms. Stevenson. Whatever.
The book takes place in, I dunno, the late seventies, probably, because it was published in 1982, and I think I read somewhere that it took a while for a publisher to accept it—or Nancy Garden published it herself because no one wanted it, but I might be making that up. Anyway, the homophobia is really strong because of the time period, but the sad thing is, twenty-five years later, the reactions of Liza’s family and classmates and headmistress do not seem out of place. Neither do Liza and Annie’s fears of being all gay in public.
Sigh. It is hard to be gay.
Allison just suggested that Ellen Page could be in my fantasy movie, and I wholeheartedly agree. I think she’d be Liza. Who could be Annie, then? This is hard. I am clearly not cut out to be in pictures.
September 10, 2008
Genius experiments
So. I downloaded iTunes 8 because I really, really, really wanted to see how good this Genius feature was going to be, and I made 3 quick playlists based on 3 of my favorite songs these days.
The first one is based on the iTunes Live Sessions version of Tegan and Sara's "Back in Your Head":
1. Back in Your Head - Tegan and Sara
2. Portions for Foxes - Rilo Kiley
3. The Sound of Settling - Death Cab for Cutie
4. Be Be Your Love - Rachael Yamagata
5. Breakable - Ingrid Michaelson
6. Satellite - Guster
7. I Know I Know I Know - Tegan and Sara
8. 12:51 - The Strokes
9. Bottle It Up - Sara Bareilles
10. If She Wants Me - Belle & Sebastian
11. On the Radio - Regina Spektor
12. The Story - Brandi Carlile
13. Everything I'm Not - The Veronicas
14. Catch My Disease - Ben Lee
15. Crooked Teeth - Death Cab for Cutie
16. Brick - Ben Folds Five
17. Four Winds - Bright Eyes
18. Taper Jean Girl - Kings of Leon
19. Nineteen - Tegan and Sara
20. Silver Lining - Rilo Kiley
21. Phantom Limb - The Shins
22. Anyone Else But You - The Moldy Peaches
23. Us - Regina Spektor
24. Goodnight Goodnight - Hot Hot Heat
25. Fluorescent Adolescent - Arctic Monkeys
This one's based on "Downpour":
1. Downpour - Brandi Carlile
2. You Don't Make It Easy, Babe - Josh Ritter
3. Get Out the Map - Indigo Girls
4. Slung-Lo - Erin McKeown
5. Gravity - Sara Bareilles
6. Tried to Be True - Indigo Girls & Brandi Carlile
7. Airline to Heaven - Wilco
8. Sunny Came Home - Shawn Colvin
9. Breakable - Ingrid Michaelson
10. Welcome Me - Indigo Girls
11. See the World - Gomez
12. Hallelujah - Brandi Carlile
13. Madly - Tristan Prettyman
14. Song Beneath the Song - Maria Taylor
15. Life Less Ordinary - Carbon Leaf
16. Language or the Kiss - Indigo Girls
17. Golden Age of Radio - Josh Ritter
18. Not As We - Alanis Morissette
19. What Light - Wilco
20. Gotta Serve Somebody - Bob Dylan
21. The Facts about Jimmy - Shawn Colvin
22. When the Stars Go Blue - Ryan Adams
23. The Story - Brandi Carlile
24. Across the Universe - Rufus Wainwright
25. Southland in the Springtime - Indigo Girls
And this final one, just so I could embarrass myself some more on the internet, is based on "Since U Been Gone":
1. Since U Been Gone - Kelly Clarkson
2. Everything I'm Not - The Veronicas
3. You and I Both - Jason Mraz
4. Hero - Mariah Carey
5. As Lovers Go - Dashboard Confessional
6. Wreck of the Day - Anna Nalick
7. Ironic - Alanis Morissette
8. Samson - Regina Spektor
9. Addicted - Kelly Clarkson
10. You Had Me - Joss Stone
11. Comfortable - John Mayer
12. Love and Memories - O.A.R.
13. The Sound of Settling - Death Cab for Cutie
14. This Year's Love - David Gray
15. Say You'll Be There - Spice Girls
16. Amazing - Josh Kelley
17. 4Ever - The Veronicas
18. You Thought Wrong - Kelly Clarkson & Tamyra Gray
19. Look After You - The Fray
20. You Found Me - Kelly Clarkson
21. Always Be My Baby - Mariah Carey
22. My Prerogative - Britney Spears
23. Black Roses Red - Alana Grace
24. Only Hope - Mandy Moore
25. Why Can't I? - Liz Phair
On the whole, Genius does a decent job of pulling songs that do go rather well together, but it repeats artists more often than I would in the space of twenty-five songs, and... I don't know. I usually make playlists for driving, so I pay more attention to what I like to sing while I'm in the car than whether or not the songs flow or whatever. My playlists are fun, if not musically sophisticated.
Anyway, Genius is fun just for seeing which songs it matches together, but it will not take over playlist duty the next time I drive to Canada. Also, I just realized it's basically a fancified version of iTunes' old feature, Smart Shuffle or whatever the crap that was. Party Shuffle? Yeah. It's better than that, but still not better than me!
The first one is based on the iTunes Live Sessions version of Tegan and Sara's "Back in Your Head":
1. Back in Your Head - Tegan and Sara
2. Portions for Foxes - Rilo Kiley
3. The Sound of Settling - Death Cab for Cutie
4. Be Be Your Love - Rachael Yamagata
5. Breakable - Ingrid Michaelson
6. Satellite - Guster
7. I Know I Know I Know - Tegan and Sara
8. 12:51 - The Strokes
9. Bottle It Up - Sara Bareilles
10. If She Wants Me - Belle & Sebastian
11. On the Radio - Regina Spektor
12. The Story - Brandi Carlile
13. Everything I'm Not - The Veronicas
14. Catch My Disease - Ben Lee
15. Crooked Teeth - Death Cab for Cutie
16. Brick - Ben Folds Five
17. Four Winds - Bright Eyes
18. Taper Jean Girl - Kings of Leon
19. Nineteen - Tegan and Sara
20. Silver Lining - Rilo Kiley
21. Phantom Limb - The Shins
22. Anyone Else But You - The Moldy Peaches
23. Us - Regina Spektor
24. Goodnight Goodnight - Hot Hot Heat
25. Fluorescent Adolescent - Arctic Monkeys
This one's based on "Downpour":
1. Downpour - Brandi Carlile
2. You Don't Make It Easy, Babe - Josh Ritter
3. Get Out the Map - Indigo Girls
4. Slung-Lo - Erin McKeown
5. Gravity - Sara Bareilles
6. Tried to Be True - Indigo Girls & Brandi Carlile
7. Airline to Heaven - Wilco
8. Sunny Came Home - Shawn Colvin
9. Breakable - Ingrid Michaelson
10. Welcome Me - Indigo Girls
11. See the World - Gomez
12. Hallelujah - Brandi Carlile
13. Madly - Tristan Prettyman
14. Song Beneath the Song - Maria Taylor
15. Life Less Ordinary - Carbon Leaf
16. Language or the Kiss - Indigo Girls
17. Golden Age of Radio - Josh Ritter
18. Not As We - Alanis Morissette
19. What Light - Wilco
20. Gotta Serve Somebody - Bob Dylan
21. The Facts about Jimmy - Shawn Colvin
22. When the Stars Go Blue - Ryan Adams
23. The Story - Brandi Carlile
24. Across the Universe - Rufus Wainwright
25. Southland in the Springtime - Indigo Girls
And this final one, just so I could embarrass myself some more on the internet, is based on "Since U Been Gone":
1. Since U Been Gone - Kelly Clarkson
2. Everything I'm Not - The Veronicas
3. You and I Both - Jason Mraz
4. Hero - Mariah Carey
5. As Lovers Go - Dashboard Confessional
6. Wreck of the Day - Anna Nalick
7. Ironic - Alanis Morissette
8. Samson - Regina Spektor
9. Addicted - Kelly Clarkson
10. You Had Me - Joss Stone
11. Comfortable - John Mayer
12. Love and Memories - O.A.R.
13. The Sound of Settling - Death Cab for Cutie
14. This Year's Love - David Gray
15. Say You'll Be There - Spice Girls
16. Amazing - Josh Kelley
17. 4Ever - The Veronicas
18. You Thought Wrong - Kelly Clarkson & Tamyra Gray
19. Look After You - The Fray
20. You Found Me - Kelly Clarkson
21. Always Be My Baby - Mariah Carey
22. My Prerogative - Britney Spears
23. Black Roses Red - Alana Grace
24. Only Hope - Mandy Moore
25. Why Can't I? - Liz Phair
On the whole, Genius does a decent job of pulling songs that do go rather well together, but it repeats artists more often than I would in the space of twenty-five songs, and... I don't know. I usually make playlists for driving, so I pay more attention to what I like to sing while I'm in the car than whether or not the songs flow or whatever. My playlists are fun, if not musically sophisticated.
Anyway, Genius is fun just for seeing which songs it matches together, but it will not take over playlist duty the next time I drive to Canada. Also, I just realized it's basically a fancified version of iTunes' old feature, Smart Shuffle or whatever the crap that was. Party Shuffle? Yeah. It's better than that, but still not better than me!
September 9, 2008
A weekly feature?
I knew investing in the Gossip Girl season pass was a brilliant idea. Good morning, Blake Lively in a bra!
However. Making out with Dan in the bathroom of a bus? Ew. Ew. Ew. (Mostly for the bus, but still a little bit for the Dan.)
How cute was Chuck's squash playing outfit? (What even is squash, by the way? It looks like raquetball, I guess.) Chuck gets the best clothes. Why isn't he gay?
(Seriously. How gay is this capture? Chuck gettin' some sweaty young man's digits.)
Oh Chuck. Selling his club to keep Mrs. Archibald's spoiled ass in her finery. He does have a functioning heart. Why can't he tell Blair he loves her?
You know who I didn't miss? Vanessa. She's kind of hot, but she's too annoying for it to be worth it. And why is Rufus asking her for advice? He's a grown man, and she's a child! What weirdness.
I don't like Blair trying too hard. Especially not for some guy. Oh, but Serena's reactions kind of make up for it.
I sure do love Blake's face.
Oh, Blair. Uncovering the dirt. As soon as she has something to use as blackmail, she's back to Queen B and not this desperate wannabe. Bitchface looks much better on her than sucking up.
Um, two episodes into the season, and we still haven't seen Lily, but we did see Serena's evil grandmother? And where is Eric? Why did we have to trade him for Vanessa? And what is Vanessa doing with Nate, getting her cafe all set up for a romantic dinner? I thought they decided they shouldn't date. Oh, whatever.
Serena and Chuck as stepsiblings is actually kind of fun. (I tried to get a capture of her stealing his orange juice--or "orange juice," since it is Chuck after all--but his face looked awful in all of them, so...you'll just have to imagine it.) Now we just need a Serena-Eric-Chuck bonding session. I might die from the cuteness.
However. Making out with Dan in the bathroom of a bus? Ew. Ew. Ew. (Mostly for the bus, but still a little bit for the Dan.)How cute was Chuck's squash playing outfit? (What even is squash, by the way? It looks like raquetball, I guess.) Chuck gets the best clothes. Why isn't he gay?
(Seriously. How gay is this capture? Chuck gettin' some sweaty young man's digits.)You know who I didn't miss? Vanessa. She's kind of hot, but she's too annoying for it to be worth it. And why is Rufus asking her for advice? He's a grown man, and she's a child! What weirdness.
I don't like Blair trying too hard. Especially not for some guy. Oh, but Serena's reactions kind of make up for it.
I sure do love Blake's face.
Oh, Blair. Uncovering the dirt. As soon as she has something to use as blackmail, she's back to Queen B and not this desperate wannabe. Bitchface looks much better on her than sucking up.
Um, two episodes into the season, and we still haven't seen Lily, but we did see Serena's evil grandmother? And where is Eric? Why did we have to trade him for Vanessa? And what is Vanessa doing with Nate, getting her cafe all set up for a romantic dinner? I thought they decided they shouldn't date. Oh, whatever.Serena and Chuck as stepsiblings is actually kind of fun. (I tried to get a capture of her stealing his orange juice--or "orange juice," since it is Chuck after all--but his face looked awful in all of them, so...you'll just have to imagine it.) Now we just need a Serena-Eric-Chuck bonding session. I might die from the cuteness.
September 5, 2008
Let's talk about Gossip Girl
I got distracted during the season premiere, so I missed a lot of it, and I finally got to watch it again, so here are some thoughts!
We were clearly meant to think that blonde lady Nate was making out with in the beginning was Serena, huh? I didn't fall for it. You know who she is? (This was bugging me all Monday night.) Sherry from Gilmore Girls. You know what this reminds me of? Pacey and the English teacher. Except all Upper East Side-y.
Dan the playboy is pretty gross. Dan the anything is pretty gross. He's so judgmental! I don't know. Serena is too good for him.
And what happened to Serena's evil grandmother? I liked it better when she hated Dan.
But this was pretty awesome. Serena catches Dan's hypocrisy in action!
You know the one character who hit me in the gut this time? Chuck. Chuck's still icky, and his heart is still two sizes too small, but he has one! And it has feelings! Even if icky Chuck can't tell Blair he loves her he does, as well as his Grinch-sized heart can. Blair deserves better than a Grinch-sized heart, of course, so I don't blame her for walking away, but it was so. Sad.
I have to say... I kind of still hate Jenny, even though she's being nice again. And Eric needs a friend! Maybe Eric can make her likable. I love Eric. I love him--I love him even more when he's bonding with Chuck. I love how Chuck was the one he told about being gay. I can't believe I love the boys more than the girls these days. I can't believe I felt worse for Chuck than I did for Blair.
What has become of me?
Oh, wait. This'll bring things back to normal.
Oh, white parties. Brilliant idea, apparently. (Even Dan looks good! What is happening?)
We were clearly meant to think that blonde lady Nate was making out with in the beginning was Serena, huh? I didn't fall for it. You know who she is? (This was bugging me all Monday night.) Sherry from Gilmore Girls. You know what this reminds me of? Pacey and the English teacher. Except all Upper East Side-y.
Dan the playboy is pretty gross. Dan the anything is pretty gross. He's so judgmental! I don't know. Serena is too good for him.
And what happened to Serena's evil grandmother? I liked it better when she hated Dan.
But this was pretty awesome. Serena catches Dan's hypocrisy in action!
You know the one character who hit me in the gut this time? Chuck. Chuck's still icky, and his heart is still two sizes too small, but he has one! And it has feelings! Even if icky Chuck can't tell Blair he loves her he does, as well as his Grinch-sized heart can. Blair deserves better than a Grinch-sized heart, of course, so I don't blame her for walking away, but it was so. Sad.
I have to say... I kind of still hate Jenny, even though she's being nice again. And Eric needs a friend! Maybe Eric can make her likable. I love Eric. I love him--I love him even more when he's bonding with Chuck. I love how Chuck was the one he told about being gay. I can't believe I love the boys more than the girls these days. I can't believe I felt worse for Chuck than I did for Blair.What has become of me?
Oh, wait. This'll bring things back to normal.
Oh, white parties. Brilliant idea, apparently. (Even Dan looks good! What is happening?)September 4, 2008
We'll see who's a Genius
So Apple is allegedly releasing new iPods next Tuesday, as well as launching iTunes 8 which will have some interesting new features. The iPods that look like they're being updated are the nano and the touch, which does me no good, unless the iPod touch magically gets a 160GB hard drive. Then I might do something stupid, because I've been in a bad mood all month, and something new and shiny could probably cheer me up for at least a day.
Stupid disease.
Anyway, the thing I'm interested in this time, since the iPod classics look to be staying the same, is a new rumored feature in iTunes called Genius, which can apparently generate playlists from your library of songs that just, like, go perfectly together. I am eager to see how well this works because few people have a more eclectic music collection than I. These recommendation generator things always fail to impress me, because while I seem to share big chunks of my taste in music (and books) with a bunch of other people, it never really matches up. I wonder what it'll do with my collection. I love making playlists--I don't think Genius will be better at it than me. Twice, I made a 350-song playlist for a roadtrip, and they were both super awesome, if rather similar. I'd like to see an automated program make a playlist that'll take me out of the country and back! Boo-yah!
In lieu of purchasing a 160GB iPod touch that doesn't exist, I just bought season one of Gossip Girl on iTunes. (I almost bought the first season of Doug, but I decided Gossip Girl would keep me more occupied.) More economical anyway, if not as shiny. (Hee, one of the early episodes is called "Bad News Blair.")
In other geek news, I've been using my (interminable) convalescent period to rip my DVDs to my iMac, and I totally just ran out of room on the hard drive, and I am not even anywhere near halfway done. I've only just begun the Cs in movies, and the tv shows I haven't been doing in any particular order (for shame!), but they're not halfway done either. I do have a shiny external hard drive that I've only been using to back up my non-media files, so I'll start copying new media files there, but I think I'll run out of room on that long before the halfway point, too. I should have gotten the 500GB iMac, but that shit is expensive, yo.
Anyway, I wanted to do this because of Apple's Front Row application that lets you access your media library with a remote control, so I could just lie in bed and watch whatever movie or tv show I wanted without having to get up and put in a DVD. I know that sounds like the epitome of sloth (and perhaps it is), but something about having your entire media library instantly accessible is just so appealing. Then! I could invest in an AppleTV, and I could watch all my movies on the big widescreen tv without having to bother to go downstairs and get the DVD. It would be super awesome for something like a Pirates or Harry Potter marathon. Or, like, a Gossip Girl or Top Model or Futurama marathon.
The only thing I don't like about Front Row is that you can't make video playlists, so you can't just watch all the episodes of one season of a tv show without individually selecting each episode. It's a small thing, I suppose, but it's kind of annoying when the episodes are half-hour ones.
Oh! The other thing about Front Row that bugs the crap out of me is that it doesn't order tv shows by season, or episodes by number. It orders them by how recently you added them to your library. Why doesn't it just mimic the iTunes library? Everything in there is anal-retentively arranged. Because that's how I roll.
The first week of mono, I went on a book reading tear, by which I mean I read two books in one week, but ever since then I've read like 40 pages of Memoirs of a Geisha. I'm so tired, y'all. Too tired to read. And that is a bad sign.
Stupid disease.
Anyway, the thing I'm interested in this time, since the iPod classics look to be staying the same, is a new rumored feature in iTunes called Genius, which can apparently generate playlists from your library of songs that just, like, go perfectly together. I am eager to see how well this works because few people have a more eclectic music collection than I. These recommendation generator things always fail to impress me, because while I seem to share big chunks of my taste in music (and books) with a bunch of other people, it never really matches up. I wonder what it'll do with my collection. I love making playlists--I don't think Genius will be better at it than me. Twice, I made a 350-song playlist for a roadtrip, and they were both super awesome, if rather similar. I'd like to see an automated program make a playlist that'll take me out of the country and back! Boo-yah!
In lieu of purchasing a 160GB iPod touch that doesn't exist, I just bought season one of Gossip Girl on iTunes. (I almost bought the first season of Doug, but I decided Gossip Girl would keep me more occupied.) More economical anyway, if not as shiny. (Hee, one of the early episodes is called "Bad News Blair.")
In other geek news, I've been using my (interminable) convalescent period to rip my DVDs to my iMac, and I totally just ran out of room on the hard drive, and I am not even anywhere near halfway done. I've only just begun the Cs in movies, and the tv shows I haven't been doing in any particular order (for shame!), but they're not halfway done either. I do have a shiny external hard drive that I've only been using to back up my non-media files, so I'll start copying new media files there, but I think I'll run out of room on that long before the halfway point, too. I should have gotten the 500GB iMac, but that shit is expensive, yo.
Anyway, I wanted to do this because of Apple's Front Row application that lets you access your media library with a remote control, so I could just lie in bed and watch whatever movie or tv show I wanted without having to get up and put in a DVD. I know that sounds like the epitome of sloth (and perhaps it is), but something about having your entire media library instantly accessible is just so appealing. Then! I could invest in an AppleTV, and I could watch all my movies on the big widescreen tv without having to bother to go downstairs and get the DVD. It would be super awesome for something like a Pirates or Harry Potter marathon. Or, like, a Gossip Girl or Top Model or Futurama marathon.
The only thing I don't like about Front Row is that you can't make video playlists, so you can't just watch all the episodes of one season of a tv show without individually selecting each episode. It's a small thing, I suppose, but it's kind of annoying when the episodes are half-hour ones.
Oh! The other thing about Front Row that bugs the crap out of me is that it doesn't order tv shows by season, or episodes by number. It orders them by how recently you added them to your library. Why doesn't it just mimic the iTunes library? Everything in there is anal-retentively arranged. Because that's how I roll.
The first week of mono, I went on a book reading tear, by which I mean I read two books in one week, but ever since then I've read like 40 pages of Memoirs of a Geisha. I'm so tired, y'all. Too tired to read. And that is a bad sign.
September 2, 2008
If you must insist on the comparison
You know, maybe Tina Fey could enlighten Sarah Palin as to what it is the Vice President of the United States of America does. There was this one "Update" when she was talking about Al Gore (so it was one of her first ones ever), and she said something like, "What most people don't know is that he's also the President of the Senate, so he sits up there on a throne with a lion," and maybe there was something else, but I forget, and it made me laugh so, so hard.
I used to have all the Jimmy and Tina "Update"s on my computer, but then it died, and I never recovered them, and that was a very sad day in my life, because the website that provided them totally doesn't have them up anymore. And! I can't even find a transcript of it, so...maybe I'm making it all up!
Your decision. Choose wisely.
I used to have all the Jimmy and Tina "Update"s on my computer, but then it died, and I never recovered them, and that was a very sad day in my life, because the website that provided them totally doesn't have them up anymore. And! I can't even find a transcript of it, so...maybe I'm making it all up!
Your decision. Choose wisely.
August 31, 2008
Things I want to eat
Sushi: California roll, spider roll, dragon roll, rainbow roll, tuna with avocado roll
Cheesy gordita crunch
Crunch wrap supreme
Nachos with fake cheese
Nachos with real cheese
Macaroni and cheese
Cheeseburger
Burrito
Guacamole (only if homemade or from the Cheesecake Factory)
Ribs
Mashed potatoes
I would also like to feel better in time to go to a motherfucking Red Sox game. I have a whole month. Oh lord. If I'm not better in a month, I'll probably be dead.
Cheesy gordita crunch
Crunch wrap supreme
Nachos with fake cheese
Nachos with real cheese
Macaroni and cheese
Cheeseburger
Burrito
Guacamole (only if homemade or from the Cheesecake Factory)
Ribs
Mashed potatoes
I would also like to feel better in time to go to a motherfucking Red Sox game. I have a whole month. Oh lord. If I'm not better in a month, I'll probably be dead.
August 30, 2008
My mom talks a lot during movies
I saw the pants movie with my mom today, which is about all the excitement I can handle in one day, and it was exactly what I expected it would be, cheesy fluff featuring four pretty, pretty ladies. Amber Tamblyn is the best when she's being funny; Alexis Bledel will never be anything but Rory Gilmore (but she's pretty, so I don't care); America Ferrera is the hottest; and Gossip Girl starts on Monday, so Blake Lively is my current favorite. Goodness, she's so beautiful. And! They left out the Bridget messes around with a married man part of her storyline, so that was a big plus for the movie as far as I was concerned. Plus, the hot foreign lady they got to play her archaeological mentor was hot. And foreign. Two thumbs up. Oh my! And it was Blythe Danner as her grandma. I was like, "Hey, that lady looks like Blythe Danner." I'm a genius.
The movie tried to squish all three of the sequels into one thing, more or less, and I remember almost nothing from books two and three, and I read the fourth book in May, and that's a little shaky, but on the whole, I think it did a pretty admirable job. Not like the books are that great--but I still remember being all, "Well, that's not how it happened in the book" during the movie. I can't help it--it's a complusion. Though, I have no idea what I was thinking that in reference to.
The movie tried to squish all three of the sequels into one thing, more or less, and I remember almost nothing from books two and three, and I read the fourth book in May, and that's a little shaky, but on the whole, I think it did a pretty admirable job. Not like the books are that great--but I still remember being all, "Well, that's not how it happened in the book" during the movie. I can't help it--it's a complusion. Though, I have no idea what I was thinking that in reference to.
Let's talk about Sarah Palin, shall we?
I don't even know if I can get this all out, but, like... What a ri-god-damn-diculous choice for vice president. I was watching The Daily Show last night, and they had an actual clip of this woman saying something like, "I wish I could comment on all this vice president talk, but I can't really say anything until someone tells me what it is the vice president does."
Seriously?
Okay, so we have this issue here that a lot of Hillary supporters don't want to vote for Obama, so maybe it would seem like kind of a good idea for McCain to pick a woman as his running mate. The thing about Hillary supporters, though, that the Republicans don't get is that they're not behind Hillary because she is a lady. They're behind Hillary because she is Hillary. Plus! He could not have picked a woman who is more politically opposite. I mean, she's anti-choice, pro-drilling in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge (the governor of Alaska, people, wants to rape her own state), pro-NRA, and she's a creationist. She has nothing in common with Hillary Clinton except reproductive organs. Which was basically the point they made on The Daily Show.
How condescending is that, by the way? There are a block of voters who want a woman in the White House--we'll just pick a woman! Any woman will do! Oh! The best thing on The Daily Show was Samantha Bee's final word on the VP selection: "McCain knows that women don't vote with the big head--they vote with the little hood."
Not to mention she hasn't even been governor of Alaska for two years, and McCain's whole attack on Obama is that he doesn't have enough experience to lead the country. If you're running on experience, how smart is it to pick a second-in-command who's still wet behind the ears? It would seem that by picking this woman, McCain has totally doomed his chances, but... This country is terrifying.
But, really, there have to be other Republican women who have more experience than Palin. Why on earth did he pick her? There is nothing whatsoever to recommend her. You've already secured the religious right, Republicans. Do you really need someone who believes in teaching creationism in public schools on your ticket?
Listen. This woman cannot be our first female anything. And John McCain is old, people--what if he were to die in office? If Sarah Palin became the first female President of the United States of America, I would move to France. That's right, France. Because America hates France. Or maybe Spain. Just beacuse it would be easier to be somewhere I speak the language.
I hate that I have to bash this woman, too, because this country needs more women in high political office, but I mean... I can't just support her because of that. She is everything I hate about Republicans. How can a woman be anti-choice? (I can understand a woman being anti-abortion, but how can she deny other women the right to make that decision for themselves? How?) How can the governor of Alaska support destroying the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge? How can a mother of four oppose gun control?
Also. People keep saying she looks like Tina Fey! Stop comparing her to Tina Fey! Tina Fey would be a much better first female vice president!
If Barack Obama is not the next President of the United States, I do not know what will become of me.
Seriously?
Okay, so we have this issue here that a lot of Hillary supporters don't want to vote for Obama, so maybe it would seem like kind of a good idea for McCain to pick a woman as his running mate. The thing about Hillary supporters, though, that the Republicans don't get is that they're not behind Hillary because she is a lady. They're behind Hillary because she is Hillary. Plus! He could not have picked a woman who is more politically opposite. I mean, she's anti-choice, pro-drilling in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge (the governor of Alaska, people, wants to rape her own state), pro-NRA, and she's a creationist. She has nothing in common with Hillary Clinton except reproductive organs. Which was basically the point they made on The Daily Show.
How condescending is that, by the way? There are a block of voters who want a woman in the White House--we'll just pick a woman! Any woman will do! Oh! The best thing on The Daily Show was Samantha Bee's final word on the VP selection: "McCain knows that women don't vote with the big head--they vote with the little hood."
Not to mention she hasn't even been governor of Alaska for two years, and McCain's whole attack on Obama is that he doesn't have enough experience to lead the country. If you're running on experience, how smart is it to pick a second-in-command who's still wet behind the ears? It would seem that by picking this woman, McCain has totally doomed his chances, but... This country is terrifying.
But, really, there have to be other Republican women who have more experience than Palin. Why on earth did he pick her? There is nothing whatsoever to recommend her. You've already secured the religious right, Republicans. Do you really need someone who believes in teaching creationism in public schools on your ticket?
Listen. This woman cannot be our first female anything. And John McCain is old, people--what if he were to die in office? If Sarah Palin became the first female President of the United States of America, I would move to France. That's right, France. Because America hates France. Or maybe Spain. Just beacuse it would be easier to be somewhere I speak the language.
I hate that I have to bash this woman, too, because this country needs more women in high political office, but I mean... I can't just support her because of that. She is everything I hate about Republicans. How can a woman be anti-choice? (I can understand a woman being anti-abortion, but how can she deny other women the right to make that decision for themselves? How?) How can the governor of Alaska support destroying the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge? How can a mother of four oppose gun control?
Also. People keep saying she looks like Tina Fey! Stop comparing her to Tina Fey! Tina Fey would be a much better first female vice president!
If Barack Obama is not the next President of the United States, I do not know what will become of me.
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