Okay, I just got the best fake myspace message, I feel compelled to share it, in all its [sic]ed out glory:
"hii.. basically i never ever likeed anyone from myspace and i clicked your profile from browse and i thought you were festive and found myself actually interested in you. lol i talked to my friend ash and she said to go for you and we should take a compatibility test first... anyways i believe in this kinda stuff so i made one for you its in my profile just look its big and green in my profile. if we match.. and you are interested in me contact me back. i promised ash i will not respond back to you until i get the official test results so if you send any msgs to me i wont get them until you finish. you seem perfect i never had this feeling before.. **im crossing my fingers**
~toodles"
"I thought you were festive" is my favorite bit. "Festive"! That's a new one. Anyway, I'm somewhat confused--like did this compatibility test she put on her profile just start spamming random myspace accounts? The girl's from Texas, and she doesn't seem to have any friends other than Tom, so I didn't get found through some six degrees of separation. Maybe she's not real? Maybe this whole profile is just an elaborate front for a spam compatibility test! "Festive"! I also love how she/it included a fake friend with a name so I'd totally think it was a real message. Though it is longer than most of the spam messages I've gotten. Ever.
Anyway, not like I'm looking to find love on myspace, people, but it would be fun to get one real person who at least thinks I'm cool. I am tired of being the only one! Also, if I'm going to fall in love on the internet, it is going to be when some hot, available girl who just happens to live in Massachusetts or New Hampshire comments on my blog. Though now that I've opened up the blog comments to anyone, I'm sure I'll get my share of blog spam too!
PS, future internet girlfriends, if you even want a shot with this, spellcheck your spam. Thanks!
"Festive"!
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2 comments:
Stop trying to make "festive" happen! Haha, I found this post hilarious because unlike most people, I love to get those spam messages on myspace. I think they are great. I rarely understand the point, but I do enjoy deciphering them. I guess the masterminds behind these messages believes that the average myspace user writes/understands this mysterious language where every other word is misspelled and sentence structure must be jumbled to be grasped. But then again, you did say that this girl originated from Texas... and all of us Texans are ignorant fools. It might be real after all.
Goodness, I'd expect a Texan to defend her people, not reinforce my secret deep-seated belief.
No, Kelly Clarkson is from Texas, so I just can't write off the whole state. And one of my best pals from college, too. But he's from El Paso, so maybe that doesn't count?
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